About an hour after the last post I learned that he was dating a good friend of mine. The same friend who informed me previously that I acted like I was in love. I felt like hitting my head against a brick wall. Why does it always happen to me?

Felt like posting. My life has been a row of highly positive and deeply negative events. That's exhausting, mentally.

First low: hopless love. Solution: let's wait and see.
Second low: he knows!. Solution: I was reassured he doesn't.
Third low: maybe my parents will divorce. Solution: it's only maybe.
Fourth low: it will soon be schooltime. Solution: but there's two more weeks of break!

First high: I can go to training tomorrow!
Second high: I will see a few long-lost friends soon.
Third high: I will get my photos tomorrow.
Fourth high: One of my friends will be coming over in a few days, to overnight.
Fifth high: have I said it yet? I'm in love.
Sixth high: life still is good.

One more low: the weather is horrible.

Ok, that was the short synopsis of my life right now. As you might have noticed, ther are no solutions to the high's. Why do I need those?

Hello again. I guess I haven't visited this place in a while, but oh well.

This weekend was a roleplayish one too. My char, a mage, was killed once, but resurrected by two priests. Good for me. Most of the posessions of of the other party-members was looted, but mine was left for me. I guess the looters got bored with me getting all of the OG stuff out of the pouch, and forgot about my IG things. Good for me. Both of my wands were taken. One of them was broken. One, the looters lost in he woods. One of my party-members found it later and returned it to me. Good for me. It was the more powerful one. Lucky me.

The weird situation I was in for some time, solved itself. The solution is positive. Not because of what it is, but because it is a solution, and every answer is better than no answer at all.

I'm tired. And confused. And surprised. And tired. And cold. And hungry. And tired. And amazed. And disturbed. And tired. You get the idea.

Have you ever been in a situation where somebody you thought you knew acts absolutely unlike themself? And you don't have a clue how to think of their acts, but you know you probably shouldn't mention them to anyone. I think it would make anyone feel uncomfortable and unsure of themselves. Even if the words and actions were awaited and/or good, it still seems... out of place, just like laughing at a funeral.

Gladly, this is not the situation I'm in right now.

Here comes another rant about how cool my friends are. If you are depressed, please don't read it. it's just that... I think I think everyone should be jealous of such good friends. I would go through fire and ice for them, with them. I would do whatever I am capable of, for each and every one of them, and I know they would do the same for me. I don't know what I would do without them, they have been so incredibly supportive through the year and I am undescribably happy I know them. They are so absolutely wonderful persons and I think I have finally found the persons I fit in with. They respect me the way I am, without any masks. Oh god, I am so grateful to have found these friends.

As always, life has two sides.

First, the negative.

• I'm broke.
• I can't go to the summer outing, because of it.
• I can't pay my year membership because of that.
• I can't pay for this weekend's game because of that.

And now, the positive.

• I got some money by getting rid of the bottles.
• I found some money on the street. (About 5 units.)
• I wasn't so broke as I thought and could afford to buy some metal-thread-cutters. (again, now you can all see I'm not a native speaker to the English language.)
• They can cut the thread I need to cut.
• I got the lamp my dad wanted me to get. He would have been very mad at me if I hadn't.

Only four of negative stuff and five of positive! Wohoo! I guess life is good afterall!